


As perfect as a heartbreak could be

by milky_toast_06



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Best Friends to Lovers, Bokuaka - Freeform, Broken Hearts, Failed Relationship, Friends to Lovers, Heartbreak, Love, M/M, Romance, Sad, not meant to be
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-12
Updated: 2020-11-12
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:07:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,097
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27528151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/milky_toast_06/pseuds/milky_toast_06
Summary: Neither would have wanted it any other way. After their relationship grew, from friends to best friends, from best friends to boyfriends, then to co-inhabitants. They loved each other, but sometimes, love isn't all there is to a relationship
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou
Kudos: 5





	As perfect as a heartbreak could be

Akaashi looked deep into Bokuto’s eyes for the last time, and for the hundredth time that night, the immense feeling of wanting to cry tipped away at the scales. This was it. 

Around them, the bright glowing lights of the carnival flashed and flickered, the screams of ecstatic children drowning out Bokuto’s sobs. Akaashi himself wasn’t having it much better, but after living with his abusive family for so long, he’d learnt to keep it in. Not that it made the whole situation less difficult.

Still, it helped. Bokuto pulled Akaashi in for a long hug, Bokuto’s tears staining Akaashi’s purple hoodie, and Akaashi himself wrapped his arms tightly around Bokuto’s waist, resting his head on Bokuto’s shoulder. 

They’d dated for around seven years up till then. They were each other's best friends, and rarely were they ever seen apart from each other, doing everything together. From the simple things like having lunch at the same table, always side by side. They’d never really cared when their shoulders touched each other, and Akaashi was hardly ever bothered when Bokuto took huge bites of his food. Spending all that time together had made them way closer than anything could ever, and Bokuto’s family pretty much took Akaashi in as their second son.

Of course, that was never the case with Akaashi’s family. Akaashi’s father, in particular, was extremely fixated on good grades and anything to do with academics. Even setting foot in his own apartment had always given Akaashi a rush of anxiety, and Bokuto soon learnt about it. 

It’d been the typical best friend relationship until that one day after volleyball practice when Bokuto pulled Akaashi into the clubroom, after he was supposed to lock up. He was definitely abusing his captain’s rights to the key by doing what he was, but honestly, Bokuto could care less about that. 

So that was how their first kiss went; inside the clubroom, Bokuto slowly pinned Akaashi against the wall, looking to his junior’s lips for permission, but Akaashi’s eyes were already closed. Closed was probably an understatement. They were squeezed shut, full of nervousness and anticipation. 

Like many first kisses, it was short, but it wasn’t followed by any passionately long makeout session or anything, unlike what Bokuto would’ve probably liked. Instead, Akaashi had run away to hide in the bathroom stall of the toilets. 

After that, they decided to officially date. Bokuto let Akaashi plan out most of their dates and all of those nitty-gritty details. After all, Akaashi had told Bokuto:

“You just sit back and I'll arrange everything.” Bokuto had smiled. He himself was never into organising and timing and dates so it seemed pretty much perfect that Akaashi was into that kinda thing.

But seven years down the road, with jobs to hold and more responsibilities on their shoulders, they realised they weren’t at the same place. Mentally and sometimes even physically. Bokuto’s job entailed travelling around the world at any given time, and Akaashi held the kind of job where it was all about sitting and staying put in one place for hours on end. 

Planning dates were difficult, and as they matured, they simply came to understand that they weren’t the same boys from high school. They weren’t the star-crossed lovesick boys they’d once been. They’d changed, and Akaashi noticed it first. Out of the thirty days in the month, they only ever had dinner together five to seven times. 

At times, Akaashi even felt like Bokuto knew nothing about his line of work, and it was the same for the other. Even their priorities were different: Akaashi put finances first, while Bokuto, romance and love. 

It hurt. A lot. For the both of them when Akaashi mentioned it one day. In the dusty, run-down apartment they shared, Akaashi stared at Bokuto. It was better for Bokuto, and for himself. It was better for the both of them. 

Akaashi had suggested he move out, so Bokuto didn’t have to try to adapt to a new housing environment so abruptly, and also because Akaashi took it upon himself, since he had been the one initiating the break up. It ate away at Akaashi’s heart, as he packed up the things in his room into a luggage. 

He found a ring. It was a ring he’d bought for Bokuto when he received his first paycheck. Tears swam around in Akaashi’s eyes. To think that the once innocent him had planned on proposing, and that they’d both wholeheartedly believed that they would live together till death did them part.

He didn’t pack in the ring. He stuffed it into his pockets and stood up, adjusting the collar of his shirt. Bokuto had suggested one last date night--a date at the carnival. Akaashi, unable to say anything at that moment without crying, nodded silently in agreement. 

That night out, they spent the hours drinking and thinking about their high school days. They told each other secrets about them, and they talked, ignoring the fact that it was going to be the last time they saw each other as boyfriends. They spent the night sharing their memories together, talking about the things they’d miss about each other.

Every other second, one of the two boys was crying. Perhaps it was only then that they truly understood how big of an impact they had on each other. Then they got up, and Bokuto had bought Akaashi a bouquet of flowers. Together, laughing through the tears, they each snapped photos of each other as they went through each of the game booths. It was one of the most perfect, romantic, but yet utterly heartbreaking dates they’d had.

When the night came to an end, Akaashi worked up the courage to give his soon-to-be ex the ring. Bokuto had smiled, eyes probably tired from bawling the entire night already. 

They hugged each other, squeezing the other tightly, as though to let go of the sadness through their grip. Akaashi could barely breathe, but it was fine. Just this once, he let it slip. He allowed himself to be breathless under Bokuto’s display of affection, as his own tears began to fall. 

“So this is really goodbye, Keiji?”

Akaashi nodded into Bokuto’s neck, and squeezed him tighter yet.

“Do we really have to do this?”

Akaashi nodded again, feeling uncontrollable sobs shake his body. It was the hardest thing they’d ever have to do, but Akaashi knew, at least for himself, he wouldn’t want it to end any other way.

After all, this was as perfect as a heartbreak could be.


End file.
